Friday, December 31, 2010

And a Happy New Year to you too!

So who is excited about 2011??
*side note: for those wondering, yes we got internet access finally*
Moving on...
In my previous post, I made a comment in regards to New Years Resolutions.  Allow me to explain why I've never been a big fan.  It's simple, really.  I've never understood why people needed the new year to begin to make changes in their lives.  Zig Ziglar (love him!) made a comment about New Years resolutions and how it was silly to wait for the new year when every day was a new day to change.  So why wait?
Technically, I haven't waited for the new year to make my "changes" or start my "goals" for the new year.  I've been thinking about them for the last few weeks and slowly started them up.  Granted, 2011 will be a big year as I am pregnant with my first child.  And since every pregnancy is different for every woman, there's no real way for me to know what the next six months will bring for me, my body and our baby.  Plus, the last six months of the year will be filled with new parenting experiences with our first newborn.  So I'm not focusing on making monumental goals and/or changes (find a cure for cancer, paint a mural on a building, and build a car from scraps will have to wait until 2012).  Rather, baby steps is the way I'm looking at it.
So, without further ado, here are my goals for 2011:
  • finish writing my novel
  • pick up my clothes every day (yes I still throw them on the floor)
  • knock 10 items off of my bucket list (when January 11 hits, I will be able to scratch the blog off of the list...but never fear, I'll continue writing the blog)
  • write hand-written letters once a month (if you'd like to receive letters from me, let me know!)
  • finish my child development class by March ('s ridiculous that it's not done yet)
And that's pretty much it.  I'll probably start a gratitude posting on here once a week as well because I can appreciate how focusing on gratitude can certainly alter perception.  And who can't use a little pick-me-up every now and then?
That being said, I wish you all a safe, happy and joyous New Years Eve!  Stay safe and will someone please drink a glass of champagne for me?!

The end of 2010

Please excuse this post if it lacks depth or creativity. As we struggle to start up a new Internet account, my only access to cyberspace is through my iPhone. So I'll write this post to the best of my limited ability.

So 2010 is wrapping up this evening with the standard big bang, falling ball in NYC and fireworks, champagne and midnight kisses. Mi marido y yo will spend it as we typically do: in bed by 9:30 (although last night was a rare night where I was awake at 10:30, shocking I know). My thoughts on 2010 are as follows:
-personally, this year was the best by far. I had a beautiful wedding with my husband that was as intimate as it was personally flavored. We moved across the country for our grand adventure, and in the process, found ourselves expecting our first child.

Well I guess that actually sums it up. I could go on about my opinions politically (really?), religiously (anybody else follow how many trials have been going on with religious leaders?), agriculturally (farm raised bison? Seriously?! And GMO apples?! No thank you), etc. Alas, that's not really the reason why you read my little nugget on the net. Perhaps one day it will evolve into something that has more substance. Maybe it'll join the ranks with some of the other blogs that I follow (all 267 of them).

But for now, it will continue to be what it is.

I welcome 2011 as a year of firsts again. Another year for us to laugh and cry together. A year of more memories than what we can comprehend. And another year to grow in our capacity to love one another.

*and if I get Internet today, I will attempt to post my new years resolutions before bedtime. Even though, I dont really agree with the whole new years resolution thing.

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

The Queen Bee

I realize that I've been MIA for a little while.  There really isn't much of an update to give about life right now other than I'm really looking forward to having energy again.  I'm exhausted every day when I get home from work so if I even get around to responding to emails, it's a feat of sheer will and sweat.

moving on...
I had a thought while I was driving home today through the winter rain.  I thought back to those queen bees in school, the mean girls, the bullies.  I'm not referring to just females although I realize the words I previously used may seem to suggest otherwise.  My experience in life was with both male and female bullies; those experiences are definitely not ones that I look back on and laugh at now.  Not because I'm a pansy or because I don't know how to stand up for myself.  But because looking back at those memories makes me sad.  I'm sad for the child that I was that endured the teasing and whatnot but I'm also sad for the other child, the bully in the situation.

Obviously, this frame of thought leads me to thinking about the next 18 years or so of raising our first child.  Pregnancy sort of grabs hold of your conscious (all levels, sub and un included) and I've found that everything directly relates to my pregnancy now (and I'm fairly certain that others around me find it obnoxious and I can't blame them...really how does office paper relate to my pregnancy?).  So of course, as I was thinking about this "bully" topic, I began to wonder about my own child.  
I realized something in college about bullies (sad it took me that long).  I realized that bullying is a form of displaying insecurity.  I suddenly had this thought about the "mean girls" and "bullies" that I knew: what is it about you that makes you want to hate me? (or something to that effect).  I finally realized that the issue really wasn't about me all along but it was really about the bully themselves.  I'm fairly certain I remember my parents telling me that when I would complain about mean people and I really wish I had understood then what they meant.  

As well as with the bully though, catty gossip is typically encouraged with a dash of insecurity in the gossiping parties.  Looking back on all of the friends I've had, the nicest ones were the least likely to gossip.  I, unfortunately, did not have the sense to be closer to those girls and wound up spending way too much time on people who didn't really want to be close to me.  
Alright so what does all of this dribble boil down to?  My question is: how do you raise a child with a strong sense of self and confidence?  I know that my parents were encouraging and supportive.  But I also know that I struggled with self-esteem/confidence issues for years.  It wasn't until my early 20s did I really start to have a strong sense of self-confidence.  Was that an issue brought on by an environment outside of the home?  I would be lying if I didn't say I worry about the struggles my child will face.  Will he/she be picked on in school and tormented?  Or (worse) will they be the one tormenting others?  I'd like to think that we would raise a child to be loving, compassionate, and open minded about people but isn't that what every parent wants for their child?  So isn't that likely what the parents of the bullies wanted?  


Friday, December 3, 2010

Colorado vs. Louisiana

After living in Colorado for three months, I feel like I can now make a somewhat educated comparison of Colorado and Louisiana.  So without further adieu: 
Dry Winter vs. Wet Winter
Although I'm sure there are some benefits to humidity (but for the life of me, I can't think of them right now), there is nothing fun about high humidity when it's cold outside.  Why?  Because it can quickly make 50 degrees feel like 30.  Dry winters rock because let's face it, I like snow and there's nothing better than being able to play in it without a heavy coat on.  I like that I don't need thirty layers before I step foot outside even if it is 30 degrees outside. 
(Note: I do realize that we've barely made it into "winter" here so I assure you I realize that my opinion can change on this shortly).
Mountains vs. ...
Sorry but there's really no comparison.  Having mountains as your scenery every day is absolutely amazing!  The sunsets look like they have about 15 more colors in them and I love driving to work and being able to check out all of the mountains.  It's amazing!
Moving Traffic vs. Sitting on the interstate
I don't miss BR traffic at all.  AT ALL.  There's nothing worse than being stuck on the interstate and cars NOT moving an inch and then an hour later finally passing up the blockage and realizing it's just a bunch of idiots slowing down to get a view of the wreckage!  STARING AT IT WILL NOT MAKE IT BETTER AND BY SLOWING DOWN SO YOU CAN STARE COULD POTENTIALLY CAUSE ANOTHER CAR CRASH!  (I obviously have not gotten over this).  In Colorado, there is a lot of traffic but at least it MOVES!
speaking of interstates:
Construction work being done vs. ten years in the making of one covered pothole
I have yet to pass a construction site here where there aren't people working on the project at hand.  However, in BR, I can remember countless times driving on I-10 and wondering why the hell there hasn't been any progress in one year?  ONE YEAR!!!  GET ON YOUR TRUCKS AND DO SOMETHING!

Courteous drivers vs. assholes
PerBear used to get SO angry with people in BR (and I'm certain he still is) because so many times he'd let people into the line of traffic and he'd get no wave or recognition for being courteous.  I'm happy to report that every person that I have allowed to merge into my lane of traffic or go ahead of me, they always wave!  It's so pleasant!  So instead of second guessing my choice of letting them in, I wave back and smile!
Outdoors vs. Indoors
Let's face it.  In Louisiana, the list of things to do outdoors is short.  Now, I know there are some of you who want to argue (I agree...crabbing is tons of fun and I'm sad that I haven't done it in years) however, the REASON the list is so short is because the MISERABLE heat and humidity makes it difficult to truly enjoy the outdoors in Louisiana (unless there is an ice chest with beer).  I love that in Colorado it's still pleasant enough to do things outside even in the beginning of December.  For instance, Eric went on a hike today.  There's also the long list of winter sports to do.  And we all remember my post about going rafting earlier in the fall.  
Vineyards and Breweries vs. One Brewery (?)
Colorado is littered with Vineyards and Breweries.  We've only been able to visit the Coors Brewery so far (back in February) however, I know that there are multiple all over this great state.  Louisiana has Abita (there may be others but I don't know of them and I'm too lazy to do the research).  
Don't get me wrong.  I miss some things about Louisiana that I know Colorado cannot compete with (i.e. food, best friends, family).

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Pregnancy what?

So I don't really discuss how I'm feeling during the pregnancy on here for a few reasons:
  1. People ask me every time they talk to me "How are you?  how are you feeling?" (not hating on anyone...just saying that's why I don't talk about it on here)
  2. Many of my readers (the few of you) have already been through pregnancy
  3. Many of my readers (the few of you) haven't experienced pregnancy 
  4. There isn't really too much to tell
The one "symptom" of pregnancy that I am struggling with are these stupid raging hormones.
I am not a person who gets angry.  Seriously.  There are about three people in my life who have learned how to truly make me angry and I only still speak to one of them.  I could give you some silly explanation like "anger is such a waste of energy" (which I do actually believe) but that's not the REASON I don't get angry.  There isn't a reason.  My feelings get hurt but I'm not very familiar with the emotion of anger.
Until now...
Now, I struggle to bite my tongue over the most mundane things.
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